Woman on the verge...

Do not judge me by the color of my skin or by my size or by my misfortunes; but by the strength of my intellect and the gravity of my principles.

Why is it that in this day and age chivalry is dead? Although being chivalrous pertains to knighthood and everything that comes with it of the medieval times, isn't it safe to say that some qualities would be passed on to the present day?

Then why may I ask is it that these qualities are now vanishing?

I've heard stories from alot of women (family, friends, etc.) who've been searching for love;

that they haven't found their gallant knight, just because he lacks some of the qualities that we women swoon over for. Is it necessary for us women to settle merely on looks, physical attributes, intelligence, or attitude alone; when there could also be romance and all
that mushy stuff that we pretend not to like but have tingling sensations rising up our spines?When will men get it, that we women like the idea of love or being in-love? When will it occur to their thick head that we want to be romanced, swept off our feet, carried away in a white horse...yada-yada??
Can we also be held responsible for these disappearing attributes? Since women now are more
open minded, vocal and liberated. Do men really feel threatened if a woman surpasses him, financially, intellectually and emotionally? Perhaps they do but then again we women don't think of it that way...

~The reason us women slave away in cramp offices in an 8-5 job is for us to be independent that if something happens in a relationship, we'll be able to pick ourselves up from whatever hell we got ourselves into.

~The reason we study hard and become smart is so no man can put us down even if deep inside we have tonnes of insecurities...We cover this up by trying to sound intelligent.

~The reason we seem emotionally more adaptable is that when we're hurt we tend to put up barriers to prevent ourselves from making the same mistake and getting hurt again.

We wear high heeled shoes, and endure the pain; put on different make-ups, wear the prettiest dresses, spend countlessly on our hair, diet till we starve just to lose weight; all of that, just to make ourselves more attractive to you men...

We work so hard to try to be your perfect woman, then why in the world can't you guys try to be our perfect men?

From Divisoria with Love...

Today started out early, I got to Starbucks (Divisoria) before any of my friends. As I met Joan and her mom I had already drank half of my Espresso Frappuccino and lit up a couple of fags. The last to arrive was Fran who came waltzing in from the morning traffic still looking poised despite the heat, Sarah at this point was still missing-in-action. By the time Fran arrived it was past 11am so we wormed our way towards the heart of the chaotic world of "Cheap Central." We allocated materials needed for Joan's upcoming nuptials and scavenged for other things...Sarah joined us after the lunch hour, she sat with us discussing the "DRESS" and i mean the dress where we will be brides-maids in Joan's wedding...It terrified me...the thought of one of our friends getting married and asking me to be her brides-maid made me feel...OLD. In the past, I didn't mind being the bridesmaid for my aunt, uncle, etc. I was young...it had not occurred to me that we were already getting older and now it's my friend who's getting hitched...one by one we were getting plucked off from the social market. Our other friends had gotten married in a civil way so I guess i didn't really mind, but this wedding of Joan is in a sacred place...they had always thought i'd be the first to get married in a church, but that was just it...a thought. Never the less, it's a sour thought for me still...I'm getting older each year and yet the future is still unknown for me especially now that i'm back in the market. Well, what can i say things just don't work out the way we want them too...

Moving along, to our story...After Sarah had already filled our heads with images of the "Dress" we set off again to search for more things for the wedding. We walked a mile along spit filled streets and trash abundant alleys to get everything we needed...until finally...success! The end to a busy search...and what more to do for celebration but to eat fried siopao...yumm!

After that much intense walking marathon wherein i thought i might have lost 10lbs. in the process, Me, Sarah & Fran parked our butts at Seattle's Best Coffee place at the Greenbelt to savor our favorite drinks, people watch and discuss about everything, something, anything and nothing...enjoying each other's company.

As I write this I still have one more dilemma...the wedding march song i'm supposed to sing on the wedding day...THE song that i have to sing as the bride walks down the aisle...THE song that will hightlight the event as a remembrance of it's meaning and importance to the couple and to the people sharing the memories...so what would it be then?? Well, my search is over...after 4 hours of thinking about my old repertoires...the title "You first believe" by Hoku. If you're curious as to what that song is...just look for it on youtube.com for i have no idea how to attach it to this blog...by naive sense of self cannot estimate the brilliance of technology as of yet.

My Little Learnings...

I'm at my 25th year of endless search about life, love and happiness - what have I learned so far?

I have learned that no matter how old or experienced our parents claim to be, they are still children in their own right, seeking the same things others do... "Ultimate Bliss"

I have learned that no matter what trouble occurs in the family, blood will always be thicker despite whatever circumstances.

I have learned that it's better to tell someone or a particular person how you really feel than keeping it to yourself to avoid self-destruction.

I have learned that it's good to talk about your feelings because it eases the pain of problems, build a lasting relationship with others and takes 10 years out of you making you look younger. ^_^ (love this part the most)

I have learned that you can't really blame other people for their actions and decisions, because that is the way they were either taught, grew up realizing or is simply their own disposition in life where in it is the only way they know how to approach the situation.

I have learned that no matter how painful you think a person will feel when you know they're at fault, it is important for you to let them know it in a nice way...It shows you care for the person.

I have learned that you should never listen to gossip no matter how true they seem, always confront the situation to get the truth and clarify, rather than being defensive and aggresive towards the situation.

I have learned that when you're in-love or fall in-love, make sure to let your partner know that you respect and trust him/her and deserve to be treated the same.

I have learned that no matter what the problem is, there is always a solution, because problems are the "Higher Power's" way of spicing your life so you won't get bored of living it.

I have learned that if happiness appears in a form of a lover, you should grab hold with both hands firmly yet gently to avoid controlling the other person.

I have learned that if there are obstacles in life you have to face it with both eyes open and cross it with both feet firmly striding thru the bridge despite the frequency of the swing through the rough winds.

I have learned never to look down so I won't fear falling and I won't alleviate the knowledge of not being able to make it across.

I have learned that love alone does not put bread on the table.

I have learned that alot of people has suffered more than me.

I have learned that emotional pain is greater than physical pain but we can always get through it.

I have learned that no matter how bad things can get, there are people who would stand by our side.

I have also learned that I learn something new everyday...

My Passion

I used to love writing...I'd kept a diary, journal, daily thoughts; back when I was younger and had the naive longing of putting into words the thoughts i deeply want to share, but as time passed and I got a little older my favorite and reliable Parker pen (with my name "inscribbed" on it) has never expressed itself on paper. But after much thought and deliberation and a little inspiration from my cousin Thara, who has been rambling on HER blog, I've decided to give my pen an early retirement and my purse a hefty break - i let my fingers do the work.

Looking back, I don't really remember why I had stopped writing. I guess it's just like LOVE, you can fall out of it sometimes...So with much circumstances that occur in my life I've decided to share with you all my learnings and my opinions. You're all free to leave your thoughts as well and your learning on my chosen subject matter...Happy Reading! ^_^